Sexuality and Ethics

Sexology / Sexuality and Ethics

Sexuality and Ethics

Let us start with examining a problem of weakening of the reproductive function. We need to realize that this is an indication that not everything is alright in the organism. One may stimulate one’s malfunctioning reproductive system by drugs but this is not a reliable method. The drugs’ action ends but the problem remains — as long as its cause is not eliminated.

There exist two general approaches to treatment of diseases: the first one is to “smooth away” their outer manifestations (symptoms) by taking various medications, visiting psychotherapists, healers, etc., while the second consists in eliminating the causes of the disease.

Any disease must be viewed as a consequence of our ethic mistakes, i.e. those we make in interactions with other living beings — with plants, animals, people, and God, as well as of our neglecting the necessity to constantly progress spiritually and indulging in our weaknesses. And another thing that we need to remember is that in this field only those results will be solid that are achieved by one’s own efforts, not someone else’s. True help in this would be rendered to you not by those who will do something for you, but by those who will prompt you on the direction of your own efforts.

It is thanks to one’s own efforts that one can achieve a realization of one’s latent potential in terms of psychic self-regulation. By using psychic self-regulation methods one can gain precise control over one’s emotions, develop strong will, get rid of a great variety of diseases [14,16,18,20-21,23-25], and get an absolute control over of one’s reproductive system.

Sexual relations are legitimate. Perverted religious morality that once declared them low, shameful, and unclean must not be accepted by modern people. As long ago as in the 1^st century in the apocryphal Gospel of Mary Magdalene an attempt was made to destroy this doctrine and to praise sexual love — as one of the legitimate aspects of Love. It gives one an opportunity to learn how to give oneself to another and to correctly — from the spiritual standpoint! — develop one’s emotional sphere.

According to the definition of the World Health Organization as of 1977 sexual relationships enrich people, improve their communication skills and increase their ability to love.

This has even been acknowledged by Russian Orthodox Church *.

However declaring sexual relationships legitimate and not shameful is not tantamount to propagating casual sex. It does not make any sense to repeat well-known things about sexually transmitted diseases, AIDS, etc. Recalling what we have said about bioenergetic aspects of sexual relationships would be enough to demonstrate the inexpediency of casual sex. Cultivation of the reasonable abstinence is also necessary for development of control over the sexual urge — for the sake of a personal spiritual progress.

Talking about sex from the perspective of religious self-perfection, I think it would be appropriate to quote two fragments from the Gospel of Mary Magdalene*:

12. …I asked Him, “Teacher, how can a sinful one, as I am, be compared to the Apostles?”

13. He answered me, “What is sinful in this world is righteous in My Father’s Kingdom”.

20. They caught me and wanted to stone me. I, sinful, loved a man who was married and had three children. The relatives of his wife brought me to the square and began to shout in a loud voice, “Let us kill the adulteress! She desecrated the Law!”

21. Then came the Christ and told them, “Let him, who is without a sin, throw the first stone!” And Son of Man made the crowd disperse.

22. Then He approached me and kneeled before me.

23. …I was burning with shame and fear. The sublime was taking place in my soul. I fell on the ground and cried. He stroked my hair and told:

24. “My dear sister, find strength to listen to Me. Much evil exists on this Earth, much lies has been said by the evil one. Forget that you are a sinner and tell Me whether you heart lives when you love?”

25. It does, Lord! When I do not love it is dead”.

26 “Then love, heavenly sister, and do not sin anymore, thinking that you are a sinner”.

These words are in a total conformity with the essence of the Teachings of Jesus Christ, which consist in the following:

In order to learn to love God one has to possess a developed ability to love emotionally. And this ability can be gained through development of corresponding bioenergetic structures, which are organs of emotional love, in essence. Among these structures the major role is played by anahata.

Development of a set of structures of the organism responsible for emotional love — the so called “emotional center” [103] — can be achieved by both a natural (exoteric) way (development of ethically correct attitude towards all people and each specific person, as well as towards all living beings — in all aspects of life including sexual relationships), and by means of special (esoteric) methods of working with the discussed structures directly.

And only if we have developed the “emotional center” we are able to direct our love also to God — not only with our minds but also with our hearts. Since emotional love is the mechanism that connects one person with another, which connects man with God.

The Teachings of Jesus Christ contain many instructions on how man can learn to love emotionally using exoteric methods. Let us look at the following precepts from the New Testament:

“I give you a new commandment, that you love one another… By this everyone will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another” (John 13:34-35).

“I am giving you these commands so that you may love one another” (john 15:17). “…Love one another with mutual affection…” (Romans 12:10). “Great one another with a holy kiss” (2 Cor. 13:12).

“Above all, maintain constant love for one another, for love covers a multitude of sins” (1 Peter 4:8).

“Those who say, “I love God,” and hate their brothers or sisters, are liars” (1 John 4:20).

“Beloved, let us love one another, because love is from God…” (1 John 4:7).

“God is Love, and those who abide in Love abide in God, and God abides in them” (1 John 4:16).

* * *

Emotional love has multiple aspects. It may be manifested as admiration, respect, devotion, affection, care, compassion, gratitude, feeling of oneness with the object of one’s love, sexually colored tenderness, willingness to self-sacrifice, and so on. We must master all these aspects of love on the way to our self-perfection.

But we do not have to love each person with all aspects of love.

* * *

So, saying that sexual relationships can play an important role in the spiritual advancement of a person we will attempt to answer the following question: are those followers of various religions who practice celibacy right?

Yes, they are, too.

There are many people for whom egotistic sex is the most important thing. Lust is their most distinct feature. It determines their whole lifestyle. Often it is accompanied by rude violence in sexual relationships, ignoring interests of the partner and bioenergetic vampirism. It would be appropriate for them to learn to get their primitive passions under control.

The cause of one’s bioenergetic vampirism is a perverted kind of love: love for oneself, seeking to receive something from one’s partner, as opposed to striving to give them one’s love. In most cases our emotions serve as a mechanism that brings bioenergies into motion. We may either fill other people with invigorating bioenergy or suck it away from them.

If we posses a developed ability to love correctly (as a giving of oneself) — we have an opportunity to reach a very high level of harmony in relationships with the same kind of people as we are*.

But we also may turn living with other people into a nightmare (both for them and for ourselves) if we start to want something from them, adopting a consumeristic attitude. If we do, then those whom we want something from start feeling exhausted and develop an intensive desire to avoid contacts with us. One may say that wanting love from another is the best way to destroy loving relationships.

In conjunction with what we have just said let us think about another perverted kind of love — jealousy.

* * *

“Three are the gateways of this hell leading to the ruin of the self: lust, wrath, and greed. Therefore let man renounce these three.

The man who has escaped these three gates of darkness practices what is good for himself and thus attains the Supreme Goal” (The Bhagavad Gita, 16:21-22).

Therefore, those who possess an uncontrolled or egotistic sexual drive are absolutely right when they attempt to suppress it — for the sake of attainment of Perfection — by means of strict celibacy or other self-restraints.

But also right are those who, not having the mentioned defects of love, use sexual relationships as a school for further spiritual advancement.

The whole essence of spiritual development of a person comes to only one thing: to learn a perfect love for everyone and Everything [16,22,24]. On this Path — at different stages of it — different methods should be used, that sometimes appear to be opposite.

By the way, Krishna Who said the words that we cited from the Bhagavad Gita had wives and children.

And let us remember that sexual relationships will play a positive role for us only if we have a correct attitude towards them. The main goal that we should have in this respect is: to learn to never want anything from anyone.